Baptist pastors dating parishoners
Baptist pastors dating parishoners - cherryblossom dating
I have spoken with countless numbers of these men and women.And each time I am reminded of how much I need to love God with all my heart, and to be totally devoted to my wife.
And after dozens, perhaps a few hundred, of these conversations, I see patterns.
Pastors, like everyone else, don’t want to have their sex lives examined by their community.
Especially if that community is paying their salary, and holds them up as a model of moral behavior. But when someone in a congregation finds out that a pastor and a parishioner are dating, the news is wildfire, and the questions never stop.
Working with different churches over the years, I’ve seen lots of approaches by pastors in this area of finances.
Some are completely hands-on, while others run from the issue completely.
I came into ministry after a long business career, so I’m sometimes considered unique in my involvement or interest in our church finances.
I work closely with our Business Administrator and finance committee on the budget and administration of our church finances.
Think about titles: “Reverend” (from “revere”), “Monsignor” (“my lord”), or, in the Episcopal Church, “Father” or “Mother” (do I need to explain that one? For a while I was dating someone whom convention would have me refer to as “Mother Strickland”.
Power differentials are never healthy in relationships—but we’ll get to that. You’re going to be under huge amounts of pressure to keep the relationship secret.
These patterns become warning signs for any of us, lest we be so naïve to think we have no vulnerabilities.
Because the conversations were informal, I cannot say for certain which among them were the most frequent warning signs.
If they didn’t do like this, you wouldn’t be at their church.