Strapon female on male dating sites

21-Jan-2018 20:36 by 7 Comments

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It is, however, deeply transphobic to decide that you never want to date any transgender person ever, and the choice to draw such a line is rooted in ignorance, fear, and disgust of trans people.

And even more importantly, these barriers are not a problem for trans people because we have universally bad work ethic or because we aren’t worthy of love, these barriers exist because many cisgender people imagine us as a burden, a drain on resources, a political liability, something “weird” to tolerate, a challenge, confused, mentally-ill (which is ableist), sexual fetishists, and so many other frameworks that place the burden on trans people for navigating a world that doesn’t respect us, doesn’t validate us, doesn’t support our basic human rights to free expression, and doesn’t empower us to be in positions of leadership in society.

Dating as a trans woman (online or in person) often means an exhausting stream of inappropriate, fetishizing, dehumanizing, and sometimes violent messages asking about my genitals, people expecting praise for fetishizing me, and others assuming my identity is either not authentic or repulsive in some way.

This gets even more complicated when trans women are trying to date straight cisgender men.

How do you know the cute girl you were flirting with at the bar last night isn’t a trans woman?

How do you know that cute boy you’ve been flirting with on Grindr isn’t a trans man? I know attraction is complicated, and again, no one is saying you should be forced to date someone you’re not into. You can’t assume someone’s genitals based on their identity, and more so, you might be missing out on sex that’s fun and pleasurable just because you’re unable to see a penis as feminine or a vulva as masculine.

Transphobic people will assert practically anything to get away from the much simpler truth, what trans people have been saying for decades: that trans women are simply women who were mistakenly assigned male at birth.

The problem with both of these social stereotypes for the “too good” and “too bad” trans woman is that they both infer that a trans woman is really a man, which creates an impossible balancing act for trans women.How do you know that person you have a crush on in your Astronomy class isn’t non-binary? If you’re only attracted to transgender people until you learn what we were arbitrarily assigned at birth, you’re still attracted to us, it just means your attraction is overridden by your repulsion against trans people. Non-binary people are whole and valid identities outside of our western colonialist sex and gender binary. However, if you hold these transphobic attitudes, I invite you to examine in yourself why those beliefs are there and what you are really afraid of when you say you “won’t date trans people.”Are you afraid of genitals you’re not familiar with? How is my permanently attached strapon functionally any different than a cis woman’s detachable strapon?To act like you can be the arbiter of what feelings are true feelings and what are “fake” feelings created by someone you see as lying to you just for being authentic is a truly sad dismissal of all the beauty and joy contained in trans communities. Are you afraid of being seen in public with a trans person?These interactions (usually beginning online) can quickly lead to defensiveness as they backpedal to explain how they aren’t gay, usually including insults and slurs that dehumanize me for even daring to list myself as a woman.These men are interested in my femininity, even though they may be worried about being seen as gay just for hitting on a woman with a penis, or having sex with a girl who used to have one.What would it mean for you to truly step into the fight for trans rights?

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